What would you do if your wife died?

Not that long ago, my wife and I were out with some friends of ours (we retroactively discovered that the husband of that couple is my wife's 4th cousin, actually, so they're relatives too—but they were friends first) who, like us, are facultative empty nesters. And as we were eating or hiking or whatever else we were doing, we were talking, of course. The question somehow came up; what would you do if your spouse died? The scenario being, that it happened relatively quickly and suddenly, with the surviving widow or widower not being really enough older than we are now to make that a variable to consider. So, we're in our early or even very early 50s, our kids are out of the house and (mostly) out of the state, and we're suddenly on our own. Maybe even with a nice chunk of life insurance or some other cash payment as a result of the death of our spouse, giving us exactly enough freedom to quit our jobs early and go do... whatever it is that we're going to do.

When it came my turn to say, I decided that I'd embrace something, at least in the short term, that I know my wife has no interest in; getting a trailer or tiny house, and traveling the country for a few years, seeing places that I want to see, and just hanging around sightseeing and getting acquainted with the country—especially the Rocky Mountain west and desert southwest, where my true love is—in a much more intimate fashion than I've been able to when I live east of the Mississippi and work a regular full-time salaried job still. I'd probably get tired of that after 2-3 years tops, though, and then what?

Then, maybe I'd buy a little plot of land in the country near some nice town like Sheridan or Thermopolis or even Riverton (maybe; there's a lot of anti-white bigotry from the Indians nearby) and camp my trailer there. With a shed onsite, I could store the rest of my stuff, and live indefinitely a quiet, retiring life. I'd be close enough to my kids out West that I can go see them pretty easily whenever I want to, and know my grandkids quite well and my daughters- and son-in-law, but far enough away that I'm not in their hair all the time (or vice versa). I can spend as much time as I like outdoors, hiking and exploring, I can write, I can live a quiet, modest life doing things that I love; maybe get into gardening with a little greenhouse, picking up fishing and hunting as hobbies to support myself without needing to worry about money, the infrastructure, the distribution networks of the grocery stores, etc. I can live near people who are friendly and helpful when needed, mostly, but who will also respect my privacy and let me do things on my own my own way without trying to drag me into the longhouse, since that is not really at all the Wyoming way. 

I might even find some low-paying but also low stress part time job that I could do to have a little bit of socialization outside of going to Church on Sunday and calling my kids, as well as to make sure that I don't have to worry about my modest bills catching up to me before my 401(k) and social security can kick in. That's still many years away, after all. Better yet if I can pay the bills with YouTube revenue or book sale royalties... but first I have to build a successful van life YouTube channel, or something like that, and actually write books that sell.

Would I be lonely and bored sometimes? No doubt. I get lonely and bored when my wife goes out of town for a few days. Earlier this summer, she spent two weeks unexpectedly and with little warning out west helping my son, who broke his leg and couldn't drive, couldn't walk, couldn't go to work, couldn't go to class, couldn't go much of anywhere, really. There were some nice things about having the house to myself for two weeks, sure—but mostly I was kind of lonely and bored and called her a lot, when I wasn't stressed out about craziness going on at work. (I'd much rather have been lonely and bored than stressed about work.) But given the circumstances, I think that's probably how I'd shake out. And given the circumstances, I'd probably be fairly happy with that outcome.

Hopefully I could find a good gaming group, though. Even if it's just online. That's one thing that I miss right now. It'd be even more important if I'm on my own.